and;
Love blossomed in your life,… you care for this person a lot… you love this person a lot… you can fight the whole world to be with that single person…you actually care for this special someone and in the second moment of time you just can’t stand this special someone you loved and start considering to leave that someone to someone new. When this love-hate feelings exists in your relationship you are bound to feel the emotional upheaval from one end to another just the two opposite emotions strongly.
Since relationship is not built overnight it includes multiple spectrum of emotions during which many of us feel or live in that disguised feelings that ups and downs are the rhythm of all relations and we start living with that and start to feel that it is normal, but none of us knew that this dips and dives aren’t normal and if you are going through one then you immediately need to fix the hole it will drown your boat of relationship over time…”if that special someone matters to you and/or need to move on from that intoxicating relationship.
If you are also unsure about the love-hate existing in your relation here are few signs which explains and also how can you overcome that feeling without loosing your love.
He is just so perfect in his endeavors you love certain traits
You love him so much because he is just so perfect with perfect job, house, he takes you to beautiful places on vacations, he takes you to dine and wine on weekends. Atleast he is clearly focused in his life for his career his goals all set and the path is paved, his sense of humor is brilliant he makes you laugh till you cry. There are certain traits you absolutely crave and appreciate in him and couldn’t ask for more.
You hate some other parts like hell
You love some of his traits but outright hate few certain traits of him, like his is not clean guy or he is way too lazy or he stays on Facebook chatting people up etc.. There may be some habits of him which just annoys you, though he is clean character but utterly horrendous in some of his manners/behaviors.
You behave strange at times
when you love him you love him and you two are couple goals people find you extremely ideal and in intense love, there is nothing which can drift you guys apart, then at times when the Sun is not so sunny and you both had a bad fight you fail to re-establish the base of emotions once which used to be so intense in your relation as middle ground. You both fight yell scream like enemies, once who used to be love-birds can’t see eye to eye of each other.
Your friends know this is your regular thing of breaking and then making
You often have broken-up after fights and promised yourself not to talk or see each other ever again, only to realize that the next morning you get back or not even a day spent just after few hours of this ordeal you two start kissing, hugging, caressing each other like nothing happened. Your friends nomore help you sort out the issue ’cause they are aware of your cycle which repeats every two days or three days.
You value your relation above your man/woman
You start giving more values to your relationship rather him/her even though you don’t like any of their habits or just wish they change them badly. But the thought of moving away from that person kills you as you have put in so much of energy time emotions that you start to feel that fear of restarting it all over again. Indeed you have the right feelings piling up that relationship isn’t built in a day it needs equal nurture from both sides, nourished with love & care true/ genuine feelings and lots of promises that you will stick together in good and bad times no matter what. Actually you feel that special someone is your prize in the cost of you emotional investment.
Relation starts to drag losing it’s real purpose
True purpose of any relation will never perish over the time despite the fact that everything will change and is everchanging too still genuinity will never wilt.
You start living in the relation just to fill the void even though you know that your relation has no future you keep behaving that you know nothing and try harder to keep this relation.
You fight with each other a lot and there is just a public display to being together, you relation has lost it’s deep connections, true values for each other. You are just their mechanically assuming all’s well and denying the fact that something is drastically destroying both of yours feelings. You stop caring for each others’ life priorities which is not so important for you but earlier it was.
Talk to him/her.
It’s hell important I repeat hell important to talk to your other half, sometimes it’s just you who keeps thinking a lot and creating your own world of issues and this love-hate relation is also just from your side often you are the one to initiate complains. You need constant talking to each other and that too not over phone or any other media but face to face. You need to talk to know how the other partner feels about this. It is always good to evaluate if your relation is worth fixing or not.
Discussions play vital role in shaping up the relation as we all know sex is important in love relation for it’s smooth functioning it is also important to know that talking to each other is even more important. No one is a mind reader so you need to sit and talk and talk openly without any inhibitions and hesitations. Which may solve out you love-hate feelings who knows?
This helps you to understand better if this relationship is worth taking forward or you are just entering another circle.
- Determine yourself and think positively if you are really willing to change for the sake of your man/woman/relation
- Evaluate both pros and cons of your partner and relationship as whole but remember there is no being as perfect as it is often shown in the movies, pictures, dramas and book stories, because we are all different and unique from one another which makes us an entity in our-self and when we choose to be with one altogether different entity we end up finding the differences hurtful. Humans have this tendency of getting upset when fails to get what he actually desired, but it must always make sense in positive direction and understand that differences makes us unique from one another, respect that and appreciate that in one another. Of course I am not saying not to listen to your partner and behave one spoiled brat instead ask and tell one another what is okay and what is hurtful., this is the way we grow as humans in life journey together.
- On the pretext of changing your love-hate relationship with your partner don’t start playing blame game. Blaming one another is one of the worst cause which is often found among couples who drifted, one must understand and realize their mistake rather initiating another fault story of their partner’s past: often couples are seen doing this blaming their other mate which initiates another fight and that fight creates another war and thus this never ends, accepting your mistake and realizing it and moving ahead together is important. Remember you are fighting to stay together strong and not to humiliate each other and separate.
- If you fail to establish a fair decision take someone else’s help who is unbiased, like a family member or a friend. Only if you fail to bounce back, it is always smart thing to solve your problem yourself if you include any xyz in this that means you have started to doubt your own love.
- Reconnect: remember after-all there is always a better way to change your habits than drifting away, there is no such person called ” perfect” infact you have be become perfect in the journey to build your successful relationship. This words are not worth just listening and understanding or jumping upon one person to another in sake of liking anyone completely. You will always feel that something is less or other. As we all know desires never end and so stop thinking of changing people upon people. You are never going to find that Mr./Ms.Right/Perfect Instead drag that Mr./Ms. Wrong and make that person just the person for you.
After all no relationship is build in a day and no work bears fruit without hard-work. Nothing is powerful than love always remember this and stay positive.
Keep Loving, keep living!!!
After all no relationship is build in a day and no work bears fruit without hard-work. Nothing is powerful than love so true. Very well said ma'am.
🙂